Here’s a little bit about me and why I so enjoy doing all the deliciously kinky things I do
I was raised in an open and accepting household by two people who clearly loved, and lusted, each other. So when all those sex negative messages that society tried to send my way didn’t match up with what I saw around me, or what I felt inside myself, they were much easier for me to deflect. I still had to figure some things out, just like everyone, but I didn’t have to dig myself out of a pit of bad programming and shame to get to the good stuff. And before I even knew what dominant and submissive meant I was already falling into said roles with my boyfriends and girlfriends. As I grew older, gained access and exposure to vocabulary and community, my understanding of, and need to explore, my sexuality, and that of others, became one of the major driving forces of my life.
I studied theater in college but understanding interpersonal dynamics and how they’re fed and affected by intra-personal motivations was the true draw for me. As my own peculiarities became more apparent, my personal and professional focus naturally steered toward all the wonderful varieties and vagaries of human sexuality. I absolutely love talking with people about sex! One of the great advantages to being an “out and proud” Pervert is that throughout my life, people have seen me as a safe, knowledgable person to talk about this still tragically taboo topic. And ya know what, having heard the things I’ve heard, seen what I’ve seen, I don’t really think I’m all that out there. Well, maybe I’m a little kinkier than the average bear. But I have met thousands of people who have the same feelings, fetishes, and desires that I do. The only thing that marks us as different is that we honor and accept the supposedly perverted parts of ourselves. But I assure you, conventional sexuality is a much more narrow definition than you think it is, and waaaaay more people could safely shelter under alternative sexuality umbrella than not.
BDSM has been a part of my sexuality and relationships for all of my adult life. It is a large and much loved part of who I am. I have happily and actively devoted more than two decades of that life to helping others toward the same state of self love. How we get there, and what that end goal looks like, varies by the individual. But I’ve never seen someone not feel better, by spending some quality time honoring this part of who they are.
Alternative sexuality isn’t an aberration ITS A FREAKIN SUPER POWER.
Don’t believe me? Give me the chance and I bet I can prove it to you.
A few other fun factoids to help figure out if I’m the Femme Domme for you: I’ve thoroughly enjoyed, and proudly pillaged, the later parts of my forties (shout out Gen X!). I am adamantly pansexual and polyamorous…or as is known in some circles, greedy and slutty. I’m a proud local PNW girl but my family is all southerners. My strong will and gregarious nature, as much as my style of sadism with a generous slice of sweetness, attests to the latter influence. The local library got me hooked early, and did what it is meant to do, expanded my understanding of the world, and myself, beyond my limited suburban setting. The sexual openness and lyricism of authors like Erica Jong, Anais Nin, Carol Queen were early influential beacons of hope. I identify as Wiccan which mostly manifests as putting more energy and intent into my forest time…and my fucking. I also wear a lot of black. I view my work as part of my spiritual practice, even when its someone else doing the worshipping. I’m an unapologetic, utterly incurable sensualist AND I have a hand fetish. So I’m basically the holy grail for the touch starved. Despite my frightening ability to talk to just about anyone, anywhere, about anything (though obviously I have my fave topics) I’m actually a classic introvert. I believe that being empathetic and intuitive are pathologically undervalued personality traits, and two people talking openly, honestly, bravely, about whats really going on in their heads, hearts, and lets not forget loins, is one beautiful way we can change the world. One step toward self-acceptance at a time.
If you’d still like to hear more, and I do mean that literally, the following links are to a couple of podcasts I recorded with the amazing Dr Dick. Take One and Take Two. You’re also welcome to follow me on Facebook and/or Twitter for updates and random interesting things. And I’ll soon be once again posting more in depth musings, on my Blog, for others who like to dive deep.
But nothing beats direct interaction, so when you’re ready to change your life for the better…reach out.